Bushwacking. (Or, It’s Gotta Be Around Here Somewhere…)

2009 August 17
tags: , ,
by betsy

Email from 27 April 2009

Hi there!!

For some reason (I’m blaming PMS) the whole not going to Africa thing has decided to put me in a crappy mood the past day or so. Ugh. I think the thought of finding a vehicle that would magically put me in the right place with the right people with direct in country access to organizations I’d like to work with was so freeing (for that fleeting 24 hours!) that realizing I’m back (again) trying and break into a new field in a recession with non-traditional skills has sucked the wind out of my sails. I was looking at jobs today and in tears because it all seems so impossible and ludicrous and I just wanted to hug all the women I was reading about that were making mats out of branches or cooking for their villages or whatnot. And then I was in tears because it was so stupid that I was upset when I wasn’t the one making mats or cooking for starving people and was writing on a laptop and drinking coffee in air conditioning!

Ok, that was sort of an untraditional way to start an email, but when the reporter writing a story on me for the local paper came by the other day, we started talking about people’s roles in institutions and she said that thinkers like me (and you!) were really important to the way things work and that how seeing life as this one giant path where you learn and screw up and try and fail and try and succeed and keep going is really valuable. Of course… this was awesome. And is awesome. But… it doesn’t account for all the in-between WTF times that appear along the way. I actually referred to those WTF times today as “bushwacking,” because you’re near the path but not on it. And you know you’re near so you’re annoyed and hopeful and tired and most importantly ready. Not to mention hungry to be back on track!

I think we’re both in one of those WTF times where things are going well, but not really where you wanna be, although you’re glad you’ve come farther than where you started initially?

So what to tag the posts? Hmmm… all I can think of is “the creative path” but that’s not really one word…

Okay, I need to go to bed. I really need to stop sending emails late at night, when I’m all night-owled and awake and uber-rambler.

More soon!

xo
betsy

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from → Fears, Paths

  • It's so so easy to get lost in the little things that happen day to day and stray off path. I had two job interviews two weeks ago and I'm just now getting back on track with everything I was doing prior to those interviews. (still awaiting responses ::crosses fingers::).

    Frustrating, but today I feel good about myself because I am getting back on track. I've gotten back to my list making too - which I swear makes things so much easier to accomplish... until you get to the point where you aren't sure which project to tackle next. ...
  • That's awesome that you're back on track now! It's funny how sometimes
    everything's working fine and then suddenly out of the blue, the
    record keeps s-s-s-kipping and you're wondering what the hell you did
    wrong. Today I caught myself by doing some yoga in the middle of the
    day in my living room because I was feeling stuck and off the path. As
    a result, that deliberate change in my daily activities shuck things
    up enough for me to reprioritize what I need to be doing. Oh and
    listmaking.... definitely helpful! (Until you get to that part you
    noted, where you have to stop yourself cold turkey and realize what
    needs to be done NOW and what can wait until later?)
  • That's awesome that you're back on track now! It's funny how sometimes
    everything's working fine and then suddenly out of the blue, the
    record keeps s-s-s-kipping and you're wondering what the hell you did
    wrong. Today I caught myself by doing some yoga in the middle of the
    day in my living room because I was feeling stuck and off the path. As
    a result, that deliberate change in my daily activities shuck things
    up enough for me to reprioritize what I need to be doing. Oh and
    listmaking.... definitely helpful! (Until you get to that part you
    noted, where you have to stop yourself cold turkey and realize what
    needs to be done NOW and what can wait until later?)
  • I've started back on Wii fit Yoga in the mornings. I'm still kind of picking it up, but it calms me and energizes me in a way that makes me more productive.
  • AnneKD
    I've done a LOT of bushwacking in my life, lol. Currently bushwacking, as a matter of fact. For the last few months I've been distracted by all the pretty flowers that other people call weeds, because they're not near the creativity road. Sometimes I get off the road to avoid stumbling blocks that would actually help me if I would just work through the problem instead of trying to go around it. Of course I get lost for a while in the weeds, end up getting back on the road where I left off, and work through the stumbling block anyway while hitting my head on something hard and telling myself I'm a dolt for not working through the problem in the first place.
  • carolbrowne
    When you call it bushwacking, it reallydoesn't seem so bad. In fact, it seems a bit more fun. I'm more adventurous than I thought, I guess. :-)
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